paper towels 101...



There is a reason that paper towels are perforated. Try to tear one in the middle or a sheet and you have got yourself in a real mess, They perforate the paper towels for a reason and by that reason I mean, we human can be pretty dumb.

We may be able to travel to the moon, think up the internet and invent Red Velvet Pop Tarts but there are times, we are as slow as molasses. We couldn't see it if it jumped out and bit us. There are perforations on sandwich bags and grated cheese. Just admit it, we all need a little help and god forbid, if we try to go around, the perforations. Now, you have got a big mess for the life of your product and it will haunt you every, single time you use the product.

Real life is just like that. There are perforations sprinkled all through our lives. Some times we get it and sometimes we try to get around it. Next time you think you are smarter, better, faster - remember the paper towel. Make good choices...

music as prayer...



My prayer life is all over the board. Sometimes it is quiet and in the dark. Sometimes, it is driving down the road and it is overwhelming. For one who loves music, one of my favorites is to pray during music. For whoever comes to mind.

This week, Mark Schultz's, You Are A Child of Mine came on my ipod and immediately it was dedicated to two guys. As the lyrics played, the prayer just got stronger and stronger.

This is for Sam and Brian. Heal their hearts and make them whole.

This kind of prayer isn't about results. Most of my prayers are not about results. I may be missing the boat but this is the only way I know. I lift these people up and smile, knowing God is hearing me and whatever that looks like, I am good with. It is where my faith may be the strongest. They belong to him, I am just asking for a day's blessing.

And everytime the Hallelujah chorus comes on, I turn my palms up, and soak it all it. Every last bit and whatever happens, happens.

Just being open to put music, people in a prayer, is enough for me. There is such a freedom and there is never a time that someone doesn't come to mind. He is so good. So very, very good...


There is no one in heaven, I am dying to see. There are people that it will be nice to reconnect with but none that have me longing to have one foot in heaven. Those people are all still here. When I read BabyBoyBakery's Story, I understand the concept of having your heart broken and in two places but have no practical experience to understand how it must be to live that, day after day. I understand how lucky I am. I am grateful for where I am and understand that life can change in a heartbeat. The only thing that keeps someone in that position with a sense of staying instead of going, is hope. Hope is what gets us through those days. Even those of us with both feet here, understand that hope is the bridge that makes us tell ourselves, our hearts, one foot in front of the other. Hope, for each of us, is replenished daily. There is more than enough to go around. Grab what you need, until you are completely full and able to take that next step. Don't worry about tomorrow, more hope will be on the way. Take it to heart today...

her and him...



The weather has been beautiful. Everything and more than you could ever ask for. Lots of thinking time, basking in that warmth that only comes with summer. We are out and about more. Playing disc golf at the local elementary school, sharing the field with whoever has decided to unknowingly, join us.

I didn't see these two until they were right there. They were just turning the corner and I had little time to react. I couldn't have planned it better if I wanted to, yet I was ready to go, when the time presented itself.

They have been my inspiration this week. When I find myself a bit riled with my other half. I look at this picture. When I heard that a friend's mom passed away after 61 years of marriage, I wondered about her husband and what he wouldn't give for one more stroll. Time is fleeting, we sing it in our songs and recite it in our poems but not sure we really understand. Tomorrow always seems so far away. We have more time before the fleeting, comes our way.

I would love to know their Story. Body language tells me she needs him. It also says, I am more than willing. He is looking around, she is looking at her next step. Yet, never missing a beat with each other. Much to learn, much to put into practice. Better do it now, will I still can. And as for you, let them be your guide...

16 days...



The calendar says there are 16 more days until summer. If student drivers don't make the case for it being summer, then nothing I can say will change that. We are having the best summer here, not too hot but lots of sunshine to help heal our winter memories. It is a glorious time of year, perfect in every way.

I saw a sign at a local store today that has given me more than I could ever give back. It may not be politically correct, or even nice but says everything about my love for anyone I have loved. It says it in a way, I never could. If someone feels this way about you and they know of what they speak, it would be an honor to be loved by them. And isn't that all we really want? For a few good people to overlook our faults and care about us anyway. To love to make someone laugh, a full belly laugh, that became because of you. When summer comes, we are more apt to give and accept. We don't take ourselves so winter seriously, and let the good times roll. Catch a ray or two, take in some vitamin D and move on. No matter what Season of life, summer is a time to let it all go. To not hurry, to heal the deep wounds. And to love each other...


I love you like a fat kid loves cake.... I love you that much.

the unofficial start to summer 2014...



It is part of my biological clock, the day after Memorial Day is the first official day of summer. The kids had a couple of days left and Keaton has school until the middle of next week...yet, it is still summer. I keep a photo journal of all four seasons and since they are labeled as such, I can start a season on any date I want.

The summer one has just begun. This is the third photo to make the cut. This is what our car will always look like when we are in it, no matter wheat the season. It reminds me of good times, whether it with the kids, on our way to Flying M or the many, many reasons - we are out and about. That we are living our lives the best we know how. The car has looked this way in times of good and not so good. It is about this time, this place.

So here we go. Summer of 2014, we are ready for you. Ready for the warm days, ready for the trips out the door and ready to live in the present. Enjoy while you can, the ice will melt soon and you don't want to have missed it, waiting for something else. In the Moment...

mentoring...



Had my first meeting with the girl who I may be mentoring next year. Her parents happened to be there for her race relays and they sat in on our meeting together. N is an articulate child. She has an opinion and with a little help, is not afraid to use it. On the permission form, parents are asked whether they will allow photos of their child to be taken. These parents chose not to, Of course, I understand their concern but was a wee bit disappointed.

Had my second meeting with Miss N. Any problem with having a mentor, was gone. We forget how much we really do care about wanting that village around sometimes. No agenda, just being a friend, goes a long way with a child or a Big Person. The older we get, the more we like to think we are an island instead of a community. It is about balance, it always is. That and a great big does of knowing you are loved.

Right now, Bakery Boy is mentoring me. Less than a month ago, these two young people lost their three year old as he ran into the street to get a Frisbee. She talks bluntly about the land mines she is trying to avoid but even more about how to move on after a tragedy that most of us will never share. I am in awe of both parents. They know that Someday they will see their Ryan again and that our ways are not God's ways. Mentoring, no matter what it looks like, it is a labor of love...